Obviously True

in Agreement

I was sitting with a friend last week talking about business and life and how The Four Agreements(TM)(1) has played a part, when he said something that really struck me. He said that once he began to implement The Four Agreements(TM), he realized how obviously true they are. We talked a while longer about the economic situation we are in, and the reaction that many people have had. Many of us have heard that it's not so much what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters. But do we really take heed of that? We seem to react, then look back and wonder what happened. The reaction is not necessarily thought through; in fact, we're usually not even aware of what's really going on within us before we take action.

Being impeccable with your word (The First Agreement), is about being aware of your self, your reaction to situations, and acting in alignment with your truth. It is achieved by not reacting out of fear or panic or anything that is not authentic, or helpful, to you. Many of us get lost in the chaos of it all, and forget who we really are. We forget what's important to us. We begin to doubt, and when that doubt takes over, we are no longer impeccable. Then we take things personally (The Second Agreement): we think it's all happening to us, because of us, or even not in consideration of us! We hold on so tightly, out of fear rather than inspiration, that we create a resistance that repels rather than attracts. We make assumptions (The Third Agreement) by filling in information that is not really there. The assumptions are not only about others, but about our abilities and motivations as well. We're so worried about the future, or regretting the past, that it's difficult to do our best (The Fourth Agreement) and stay in the present moment. We fall further from our true selves until we hardly recognize ourselves.

Consider business owners and bosses who react in anger or frustration. Their comments and even nonverbal behaviors can cause subtle negative influences that filter through to employees. This can create a ripple effect of discouragement that leaves these leaders wondering, "what is going on with my sales team?" Or, think about companies who have reacted by cutting marketing and training, and then wonder, "why aren't people creative and productive around here?" and "why are we slipping in sales?" Without awareness, leaders can end up simultaneously breathing down a sales team's back, hoping to increase productivity, while actually reducing the team's ability to deliver results.

When we hold up a mirror and look within, that is when we see the obvious truth. It is not so much what is happening in the world, in our workplace, in our families, or in any relationship with others. It is what is happening within us that causes the reaction and the change. It's obviously true that the only person who can create your story is you.

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Laurie Joslin has 1 articles online

(1) The Four Agreements(TM) is a national and New York Times best selling book by don Miguel Ruiz. Unlimited Coaching Solutions has exclusive training rights in upstate New York.

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Obviously True

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This article was published on 2010/04/02